Midday Smiles.

The Meeting Place > General Discussion > Midday Smiles.

14 yrs ago

( Variation of an Oldie)

IF MY BODY WERE A CAR...

If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish, and my paint job is getting a little dull. But that's not the worst of it. My headlights are out of focus, and it's especially hard to see things up close.

My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.

My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently.

But here's the worst of it --

Almost every time I sneeze, cough or laugh, either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires. CASH FOR CLUNKERS..........I QUALIFY - How about You?

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250 comments

A senior moment or two.

Video runs for about a minute.

[url=http://youtu.be/cRBcP6MmE8g]Click here.[/url]

redhead

12 yrs ago

:lol:

Is there supposed to be a click?

lin san

12 yrs ago

hi redhead

that was a brilliant joke thanks to you and ko ko you have made my day i will look up another joke somtime to add some fun and laughter to our lives my jokes though may be a little rude so please excuse

redhead

12 yrs ago

Don't know about anybody else but a [b]little[/b] rude is not offensive to me as I love the old style British and Aussie style of humour with the innuendo and double entendre.

Don't like vulgar or crude though.

lin san

12 yrs ago

does anyone of you turn on to channel 7 news? one time a certain australian news reporter reported an item of news from the usa at the end of her reporting she said this is angela cock reporting from the u s a.and this is not the only time she has done it as well ahm ahm ahm

A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

'Good morning,' said the young man. 'If I could take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners...

''Go away!'' said the old lady. ''I'm broke and haven't got any money!'' and she proceeded to close the door.

Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open... ''Don't be too hasty!'' he said. ''Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.''

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

Now if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said, "Well let me get you a fork, they cut off my electricity this morning."

:cheese: