Funeral Service

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As a young Priest in Whyalla, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a grave-side service for a homeless man, who had no family or friends.

The funeral was to be held at a new cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be buried there.

I was not familiar with the bush and I soon became lost.

Being a typical man, I did not stop to ask for directions.

I finally arrived an hour late.

I saw the backhoe and the open grave, but the hearse was nowhere in sight.

The digging crew was eating lunch.

I apologized to the workers for my tardiness, and I stepped to the side of the open grave.

There I saw the vault lid already in place.

I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, as I told them that this was the proper thing to do.

The workers gathered around the grave and stood silent by, as I began to pour out my heart and soul.

As I preached about`looking forward to a brighter tomorrow' and `the glory that is to come,' the workers began to say `Amen,' `Praise the Lord,' and `Glory!' The fervor of these men truly inspired me.

So, I preached and I preached like I had never preached before, all the way from Genesis to Revelations.

I finally closed the lengthy service with a prayer, thanked the men, and walked to my car.

As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I heard one of the workers say to another, `I ain't NEVER seen nothin' like that before, and I've been puttin' in septic tanks for thirty years!'



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4 comments

With all the doom and gloom around, thank you for raising a smile.

Hey Koko, Just read the most fantastic story of the young priest. I will try my damnest, not to, but I am seriously thinking about turning back to catholicy. You have made my day.

[color=purple][size=4]Glad you have both enjoyed the joke.

If I ever lose my sense of humour, I'm a goner.[/size][/color]

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[u]DAVE and JIM.[/u]





Please excuse just one slightly crude word...but it's necessary....read on.

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Dave and Jim were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as Aircraft mechanics in Melbourne.



One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.



Dave said, 'Man, I wish we had something to drink!'

Jim says, 'Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz.



You wanna try it?'

So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane booze and get completely smashed.

The next morning Dave wakes up and is surprised at how good he feels.



In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects.



Nothing!



Then the phone rings. It's Jim. Jim says, 'Hey, how do you feel this morning?'



Dave says, 'I feel great, how about you?'

Jim says, 'I feel great, too. You don't have a hangover?'

Dave says, 'No that jet fuel is great stuff -- no hangover, nothing. We ought to do this more often.'



' Yeah, well there's just one thing.'

'What's that?'



'Have you farted yet?'



'No.'



'Well, DON'T, ' cause I'm in Perth.'















































































































































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4 comments



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